I have an hour glass figure and a short neck. A kimono doesn’t “hang” off me, it cascades off my chesticles to the next bumps all the way down the lumpy terrain of my body.
Wearing shapeless or loose fitting clothing can add an extra 50 lbs or more to my frame and mentally distresses me when I see myself in a mirror. Normally I’m all about the tailored fit. I don’t want anything that is flowy, slouchy or remotely baggy.
I require a large portable fan when wearing shapeless clothing to create enough movement so the outline of my body is still visible, specifically that I have a waist hiding in there.
My dislike of oversized shapeless clothing was described succinctly by Mindy Kaling, to paraphrase, she likes to wear tighter clothing when she is heavier to show the defined point where her body ends. When she is thinner she feels confident enough to wear more voluminous clothing.
These are my sentiments exactly.
I Fell In Love With A Kimono
Why all the talk about shapeless clothing? I saw this shapeless Kimono on a stick thin, flat chested sales associate at Anthropologie about two months ago and fell in love with it.
Needless to say I loved it, on her. It looked great with her body shape. I knew right away for it would be a challenge for me. Bending my mind around any kind of voluminous clothing is serious advanced brain yoga.
I shrugged off the whole infatuation and told myself to forget about the kimono because it was well over my budget anyhow. When the kimono went on sale though my obsession came back and I clicked the “buy” button before I had a chance to think it through. I convinced myself I too could be a Tamera, layering one voluminous piece on top of another and then topping it all with a magical crown.
Um yeah.
Turns out, not-so-much.
As a blogger I am often influenced by other bloggers.
I appreciate and admire their style and subconsciously seek to replicate or create my own version of their look. I don’t realize I’m doing it until it is too late and I’m left scratching my head wondering what the heck happened. At the same time I am experimenting with new ideas which I figure can only be a positive experience.
Creativity grows through experimentation and allowing ourselves the freedom and forgiveness to make mistakes.
I still love the kimono, but might like the outfit better with skinny jeans.
I was having an extra fat day and couldn’t be bothered to try to squeeze myself into some jeans. Some days it just isn’t worth the fight.
Maxi skirts are the yoga pants of skirts without the panty lines which might be why I like them so much.
I’ve always loved my chesticles but as I approach 50 at warp speed I’m feeling slightly self conscious about them. I feel like I’m not supposed to show I have them anymore. Things that never would have bothered me or given me one second of hesitation in the past are suddenly making me question my clothing choices and I don’t care for it. Not one bit.
This whole aging thing is one massive learning curve.
Just when you think you’ve got it down pat, something else comes along to mess with your fuzzy hormone depleted mind. Adolescence in reverse is the constant discovery of body failings and learning to adjust and accept the “new normal”.
Do you like kimonos? What about your chesticles? Has your body image changed recently?
I know exactly what you mean… I know I look my best in something Joan Harris would wear, but who can wear a body-con dress in summer, with Spanx or some other torture-device-turned-underwear that it requires… Something easy-peasy-flowy looks great on someone tall and slim, but I risk looking like a hippo in a nightie… We need our own curvy-girl waist-defining range of summer dresses.
hahaha, that was funny Tiina. I am sure you have lots of curvy-girl waist-defining summer dresses which will make you look good.
I love this because recently I’ve been – again – wanting to buy and wear a kimono. But , the simplicity of the ideal look just isn’t there on me. I feel like my hair is a distraction on my shoulders, and the view inside the kimono is bunchy and busy. So, maybe if I sleek my hair closer to my face, wear close-fitting thin layers top and bottom, in all one color, and kimono on top. I don’t want to give up on this, because it’s all about the fabric for me. I basically want a way to wear beautiful fabrics in a simple way that highlights the pattern and texture. This is a beautiful kimono you’re wearing and wonderful colors on you.
I agree. There is a certain allure of a kimono. The gorgeous fabric and print, just makes a woman feel glamourous.
The colours are why I bought this. I knew it would go with 80% of my wardrobe.
I do think a solid column of colour underneath is slimming and a good idea.
The kimono is beautiful. Not surprised you couldn’t resist it. I have an hourglass figure as well, tending more toward pear shape, with narrow shoulders. Though I don’t have the “Chesticles” issue, the way a big, loose top hangs on me can tend to make me look much bigger around the hip area. So I totally get what you mean about shapeless tops being challenging. Wearing a flowy top like you are doing in the picture, open in front, with a slimmer silhouette beneath looks perfectly lovely on you. That way you still see your figure. And, of course, heels forever work their magic for height and a “willowy” appearance.
BTW your boots are fabulous as usual!
Aren’t those boots sweet? I walked into a consignment store when I only had 5 minutes before I had to be somewhere else, saw the boots, bought them and walked out in less than 5 minutes. I can be a focused shopper when needed! LOL
You have great boot karma! I never find really cool boots in consignment or thrift stores. I’ll never stop looking though!
This kimono is beautiful, the colors great for you, and the lace or crochet on the back is stunning. No wonder you were drawn to it. I have been wanting a kimono for a long time, but I look so bunched up and overly layered. Just like clothes thrown onto a coat rack. And this is far from the simple, lovely look of a kimono. It’s all about the fabric for me. A way to wear beautiful fabric and enjoy the color and pattern.
Oh no, is this all about discipline?! I don’t actually want a disciplined, structured look. That is not something I feel naturally drawn to. I like freedom, appreciation, movement, and self-expression for myself and others. But, to me, the essence of a kimono is its simple shape and beautiful colors and patterns from nature. And that is not undisciplined. Yikes, I’ll see where this leads me. I’m glad you have this topic and photo today.
The kimono really is pretty and I can see why you succumbed to its voluminous charms. Being a short-and-curvy myself, I find that these fuller pieces look better when I layer them over a slimmer-fitting base, usually a single color. But yeah, my body image and style has been in a constant state of flux since my teens. I hated the attention that my “chesticles” brought, and have always tried to minimize them. Per all of the conventional wisdom, a more va-voom silhouette would be more flattering, but I’ve never been comfortable with that.
I have issues with the whole thing of ‘kimono’ and the tacking on of lampshade fringe.
With these kinds of tops – look out for one that is a T shape – ie it has sleeves – otherwise you’re wearing a big square shaped envelope of fabric – with gaps left to poke your hands through and a slash at the front. Hardly flattering.
I don’t do anything without a structured shoulder (you can improvise with a shoulder pad) and a V neck or preferably a long button through.
As to chests – hmm – I like to think that I’m now inhabiting a fully-grown adult body now (not that I was ever a waifish type before lol). I have embraced underwiring and think Liaisons Dangereuses Glenn Close lol even if it is usually all covered up. As long as it doesn’t become one giant uni boob.
That print is so pretty – is it worth a refashion into something less boxy? Maybe shortening it to waist height and making a scarf out of the offcut?
E xx
I just noticed that I posted that comment whilst logged into my grown-up artist account – sorry ’bout that.
The artist usually known as Elaine Monkeypaints Tralala xx
Where shall I start? I used to have small breasts. Now they don’t fit into dresses or jackets which fit the rest of my body perfectly. Annoying. Good bras help. Bad bras can make them look like the spoiler or a bumper of a car. One solid block. Although I have nothing against a va-voom figure.
And yes, your changing body can worry you, I agree. You know what I did and that is nothing for you.
As for kimonos… I love them. Being 5ft74… (I know, I know, I am rubbing it in.)
Greetje
I always envy your long slender legs.
It’s hard to tell from the photos but does this piece have actual sleeves or is it just a wide square with holes for the arms to stick out? I think it would hang better/be less voluminous if some of the volume at the sides was removed – it would still be flowy and kimono-like but a little more shaped to the figure.
As an actual fat lady, I am all about the flowy garments but they have to have shape – usually fitted through the shoulders and chest, a gentle glide over the waist (no body con, nothing binding, but you know there’s a waist there) and then a floaty skirt or hem to catch the breeze. As per Tiina above, I can do a rockin’ 60s style Joan Harris, but everything still has to have enough movement that I don’t need to wear garments of torture underneath,
It doesn’t have sleeves. It is just a square. I agree that it would look better if some of the volume was removed by the sleeves.
I love your kimono! Walking fast is the next best thing to having a fan.
Can you belt it with a scarf or fringy leather belt and wear it with a short skirt, tights and ’70s boots, rocker chick style. I can’t tell if those sleeves will allow it.
I understand how you’re pissed about your chesticles and, well, yeah, that whole aging thing.
But now is the best time to flash around your booboids. I’ve never had the luxury.
I love your writing, Suzanne. You always make me laugh.
I’m putting this down to the big five oh. Once I pass it I’m sure I’ll be back to showing off per usual. LOL
Sure the volume adds a couple pounds, BUT you look lovely! You don’t look sloppy, you do look put together, it is an outfit to be admired on you! I know my tent dresses add a few pounds, but I feel fun in them and can wear a more flattering outfit “next time”.
JJ
I do kind of agree that it doesn’t always need to be about the figure flattering piece. That is why I just need to let my brain soak it in that I’m not really that large, it’s just the clothes. Despite the challenges with this outfit I still felt quite glamourous. I think it is all the billowing fabric trailing behind me.
I have a couple of kimono type tops, but am not in the least bit confident that they suit me. Also being slightly vertically challenged, I’m not sure I can carry them off as I too feel swamped.
And well, this age thing is so very personal isn’t it? I’m hurtling with great speed towards my 60th birthday and yet am suddenly experiencing such liberation with regards to my style. I think my blog has something to do with that. My body does continue to age, but I continue to battle back with my swimming and yoga. So far, so good. And not eating chocolate does help with this too. I have an older girlfriend (10 years older) and she always used to tell me that good make up and good underwear are vital as we age. I didn’t really take that on board at the time, but now am completely in that groove. I’ve discovered mineral make-up which has transformed my skin, and yes I spend a fortune on all kinds of clever underwear. You are looking fab, by the way, and I think the wobble is more to do with the number than how you actually look. And remember, we’re all aging at the same rate, and only one day at a time.
Anna
http://www.annasislandstyle.com
I will freely admit that I may be freaking out a bit about the birthday. That, a few extra pounds an upcoming surgery and some other health issues have started to weigh on my brain. My workout motivation is zero.
I truly do need to buy some new bras. It’s one of those things that I put off because I despise doing it. Like shopping for bathing suits.
I admit that I often neglect wearing makeup. I don’t care for it. That is why I get lash extensions once a month. I cannot be bothered to put on makeup or mascara daily. (I have super blond lashes.) My eyes and skin don’t care for it. I also have rosacea and have difficulty finding makeup that doesn’t cause rashes. I wear lipstick daily which is now also starting to bother me, it dries out my lips. Honestly my body is becoming so fussy.
You of course are right. Life is all about perspective. I need to appreciate all I have now. I’m as young as I’ll ever be.
Oh darling – do be kind to yourself. That first para is a whole load of craptimes to carry around – I hope it all passes quickly (and soon) so you can get back on an even keel.
Bras and bathing suit shopping is loathesome. Book a bra-fitting session and allow yourself LOADS of time for selection. I’m a larger lady who is often presented with something that looks like it has seat belts for straps and could be used for shot-putting. And whilst I’m all about comfort – there are limits.
The same for make-up. Book a counter consultation with some who hasn’t got an orange face and who knows what rosacea is. Again – I’m as pale as a pale thing in pale week in Paletown – I have pink hair and don’t do taupe. It sorts out the women from the girls LMAO.
Make up isn’t compulsory – and there’s nothing wrong with fussy skin.
You are lovely xx
Wow, so many heartfelt feelings in this post, all started by a kimono :)! I can see why you were drawn to it – the colors and pattern are truly lovely. I know it’s different than what you normally wear, but I think it’s very pretty on you. And boy, do I hear you on the chesticles and the getting older part. I’m just a year behind you, and I’m feeling it. My brain says 20 but the mirror and my body is definitely feeling almost 50.
Your kimono is lovely Suzanne; a beautiful colour palette and the back detailing is one of a kind. You know I’m in love with the idea of wearing a kimono. If I ever find the ‘one’, I daresay I’ll try it on and decide it overwhelms me, LOL. And what would I wear under it, wonders me?
I am a long flat chested shapeless person with no waist. One long column. And kimonos and other shapeless baggy gear suit me BECAUSE I HAVE NO SHAPE. I need the help.
You on the other hand have beautiful natural curves of your own AND a waist. Be amazed and glory in it.
Oh and swan about in that gorgeous kimono like the diva/queen you are!
xo Jazzy Jack
I like listening to you think. Really. It’s educational and entertaining. Who else can coin a phrase as funny as “chesticles”?!
It’s a beautiful kimono, and I think you made it work very well for you. And I can see that it will work very well with skinny jeans (and I TOTALLY know the days when nothing but a maxi skirt will work…).
I can totally relate to having to wear tighter clothing when I gain some weight as flowy clothes just make me look bigger…
I adore kimonos and this one is so beautiful, and as you know I am partial to almost anything from Anthropologie too. I absolutely cracked up at your “chesticles” description. As a short, plus size woman, I have never thought about this, perhaps I am blissfully unaware due to my love for beautiful clothing. I have owned a few kimonos, but have never invested in a nice one like this. Thank you for bringing to my attention Suzanne, my wallet thanks you too! 🙂
I would say my body image has changed over the years, mostly due to age I believe. You are the perfect example on how confidence can make the biggest difference in the world because that is exactly where I am. I have thrown caution to the wind and practically pay no attention to if something so-called flatters my body because if I put something on and feel amazing in it, I think that is all that matters. That confidence is stronger than any wardrobe trick in the book.
Janeane
http://www.designingfrommycloset.wordpress.com
I agree, confidence is everything.
It’s all about experimentation, and you are an artist, so you can’t be confined! And two (at least) points: 1) you have a gorgeous, enviable shape; 2) I wish I had more chesticle going on, sigh, and 3) this kimono looks divine on you, with your boho vibe and gorgeous hair. Oh and 4) I would like a fan to come with me wherever I go, but not to show my shape. It’s menopausal summer every day! xox
-Patti
http://notdeadyetstyle.com
No, I totally get what you mean when you talk about loving something on a willowy person and then it is on you and… you are (that is to say I am) not as willowy. You have breasts and the way the garment sits is weird.
That said, I don’t think this Kimono is one such garment. It looks really cool on you. Jeans might work better, but because it defines your body more (two legs etc. instead of a column of skirt. Though, I love this skirt too. It has a great slit thing happening… just maybe not liking it as much with the kimono).
I always admire that you put up outfits that don’t work for you as well as you envisioned as well as the ones you are really loving as it shows us how you think when you put together an outfit. Also- you make me want a kimono know…
In my head I’m 25 years younger and 20 lbs thinner. That is why sometimes the outfit looks totally different in my head. LOL
On the contrary – you rock that kimono Suzanne! Check out my latest collab with CHICWISH – Have a wonderful week!
Rebecca
http://www.redtagchiclosangeles.com
My body type doesn’t lend well to Kimonos NOR does it lend well to Caftans. I’m meaty. I’m curvy. Therefore I do like a more fitted item on my body. I’m not talking tight–but I’m talking about clothing that fits well and follows my curves. Kimonos, as well as some tunic tops just make me look heavier and I’m not a fan of that look.
But in all honesty, even when I was thin and lean many years ago before menopause, I never cared for the loose fit of a kimono or the oversized clothing.
First off I have to laugh at the term “chesticles”—I’d never heard that, but now I’m sure it’ll be popping up in my vocabulary!!
Second….this kimono is fabulous–I’m so glad you bought it and shapelessness be damned!
Having clothing “perfectly” paired/fitted/flattering is great, but there are times that it’s just as good to wear what we like no matter what the proportions! Besides, I think the flowiness is one of those characteristics, that doesn’t add bulk the way my sweaters can!
I would never have looked at this outfit and thought it wasn’t great (really). Besides I think a lot of the attention goes to your sexy leg peeking out from the slit of your skirt….
jodie
http://www.jtouchofstyle.com
Gimme that kimono. GIMME!
I love those colors and the kimono. My body has changed over night. I never had a belly and than one day I woke up, and there it was! Damn! I recently purchased shapewear thights and unferwear! OMG! But I was reachured when my neece(22) said: oh, I wear them for years! Thank god.
I also have an hourglass figure, more like the 40s or 50s Hollywood actresses 🙂 with large breasts and on the top of all, I am short. So I was always conscious of what or what not to wear, but honestly, it didn’t bother me much. True, I have avoided a few items, but as I grow older, I tend to wear them anyway. I liked your kimono, I think it does have movement, at least in the pictures, and I like your outfit! Maxi skirt are truly like “yoga pants” 🙂 and I love them! I think your kimono will look amazing with skinny jeans! I wish you a very nice week! Bisous!
DenisesPlanet.com
I love Kimono’s and I’m your size as well, but I’m going to keep on loving them. I actually wear mine a lot as swimsuit cover-ups and as jackets in the summer months. Stop being so hard on yourself, you crazy lady.
Although you describe aging to a T and least get me laughing about it. Just sent your creative words to my daughter and she loved it! Said you described her mother perfectly.
I love kimonos, and the shorter, jacket length version which are called Haori. I have two vintage ones which I love wearing over skinny pants. I like the print on yours, and I think it will look great with a pair of skinny jeans. I spent most of my life with very small chesticles, and then suddenly developed larger ones in my late 40’s, which I still am having difficulty adjusting to. I didn’t appreciate how much easier it was to dress the flatter-chested me than the current 54 year old me.
I think you can pull off something loose and flowy as long as you wear something fitted underneath, and the flowy layer is open at the front so you can see the fitted layer underneath – that’s my strategy anyway!
Isn’t it annoying when something you love just doesn’t feel right?
I must admit that those kimono tops have become bit of a uniform on the twenty-something festival goers here, always worn over Levi cut-offs with Hunter wellies, a flower crown and plain vests. To elevate it into befitting for gorgeous you I definitely think totally slaying it with pattern and colour so its a outlandish statement rather than a hint at boho, if you get my drift. I reckon it would look insanely wonderful with that vintage psychedelic maxi than you know I love, your fringed bag and wide brimmed hat.
Oh yeah, my body hasn’t mine just lately. Rather than despairing I’ve ramped up the sit-ups, toned down the booze and I will be back in crop tops in a few weeks. xxx