Suzanne Carillo

I have an hour glass figure and a short neck.  A kimono doesn’t “hang” off me, it cascades off my chesticles to the next bumps all the way down the lumpy terrain of my body.

Wearing shapeless or loose fitting clothing can add an extra 50 lbs or more to my frame and mentally distresses me when I see myself in a mirror. Normally I’m all about the tailored fit. I don’t want anything that is flowy, slouchy or remotely baggy.

I require a large portable fan when wearing shapeless clothing to create enough movement so the outline of my body is still visible, specifically that I have a waist hiding in there.

My dislike of oversized shapeless clothing was described succinctly by Mindy Kaling, to paraphrase, she likes to wear tighter clothing when she is heavier to show the defined point where her body ends. When she is thinner she feels confident enough to wear more voluminous clothing.

These are my sentiments exactly.

I Fell In Love With A Kimono

Why all the talk about shapeless clothing? I saw this shapeless Kimono on a stick thin, flat chested sales associate at Anthropologie about two months ago and fell in love with it.

Needless to say I loved it, on her. It looked great with her body shape. I knew right away for it would be a challenge for me. Bending my mind around any kind of voluminous clothing is serious advanced brain yoga.

I shrugged off the whole infatuation and told myself to forget about the kimono because it was well over my budget anyhow. When the kimono went on sale though my obsession came back and I clicked the “buy” button before I had a chance to think it through. I convinced myself I too could be a Tamera, layering one voluminous piece on top of another and then topping it all with a magical crown.

Um yeah.

Turns out, not-so-much.

As a blogger I am often influenced by other bloggers.

I appreciate and admire their style and subconsciously seek to replicate or create my own version of their look. I don’t realize I’m doing it until it is too late and I’m left scratching my head wondering what the heck happened. At the same time I am experimenting with new ideas which I figure can only be a positive experience.

Creativity grows through experimentation and allowing ourselves the freedom and forgiveness to make mistakes.

I still love the kimono, but might like the outfit better with skinny jeans.

I was having an extra fat day and couldn’t be bothered to try to squeeze myself into some jeans.  Some days it just isn’t worth the fight.

Maxi skirts are the yoga pants of skirts without the panty lines which might be why I like them so much.

I’ve always loved my chesticles but as I approach 50 at warp speed I’m feeling slightly self conscious about them. I feel like I’m not supposed to show I have them anymore. Things that never would have bothered me or given me one second of hesitation in the past are suddenly making me question my clothing choices and I don’t care for it.  Not one bit.

This whole aging thing is one massive learning curve.

Just when you think you’ve got it down pat, something else comes along to mess with your fuzzy hormone depleted mind. Adolescence in reverse is the constant discovery of body failings and learning to adjust and accept the “new normal”.

 

Do you like kimonos? What about your chesticles? Has your body image changed recently?