Suzanne Carillo

Aliens Stole My Groceries – No Joke

The last time I went grocery shopping was quite the experience. I should have known something was off when the guy walking in front of me let out the longest and loudest non stop elephant farts with total disregard for those around him. He just kept walking and farting.

GROSS!

I quickly changed direction and decided it was just a glitch in the system of Canadian politeness.

I proceeded to fill my grocery cart and was delighted when I scored the last bottle of Vanilla Kefir. That stuff is never in stock.

I noticed that I had forgotten to buy lightbulbs so rather than taking my full cart back to that aisle on the other side of the store I do what I often do, I left the cart at the end aisle and took two minutes to go and pick up the lightbulbs.

Wasn’t I surprised when literally a couple of minutes later when I returned to pick up my cart, it was gone.

Initially I thought I must have remembered incorrectly and started looking all over for my full cart of groceries which also contained my green bins and reusable fruit bags.

And, ah, yeah…no cart.

At that point I thought that some of the dairy guys might be punking me. I asked if they had seen or moved my cart.

Nope.

Which was odd since it had only been a few feet away from them.

I explained what had happened and a lady working there helped me look through the store for my missing groceries and cart.

I mean really…who the HELL steals a cart full of groceries?

With my Kefir? 

Were they just too damn lazy to go and pick out their own groceries? They figured they’d just take all of mine?

After looking through the store for about 15 minutes me and the other lady had no luck at all finding my missing groceries. The entire cart has just vanished into thin air.

Apparently it had been taken by space aliens in need of green bins and fresh veg.

Frustrated I headed back to get a new cart and start my grocery shopping all over again san green bins and environmentally friendly fruit bags.

At least I didn’t need to head back to the lightbulb aisle. That was the only thing they didn’t get.

I might add that to add insult to injury while I was picking out my groceries for the second time a woman clipped me with her cart.

Not my cart…me. She didn’t even say sorry!!! She wasn’t looking where she was going and she clipped me as I was passing. She didn’t even acknowledge it. She just continued on her way. Forget the idea of Canadians being polite.

I was NOT happy.

The only reason I didn’t throw my hands up in the air kick, that lady in the shins and run out of that damn store right then and there was because I had no food in the house.

Since when did buying groceries become such an ordeal?

So to the alien or person that took my groceries that day…I hope that last bottle of Kefir was off and you spent three days in the bathroom.

And yeah…my photos have nothing at all to do with this story. This is just a lovely vintage maxi dress I picked up while thrifting at Goodwill.

It was missing the elastic around the neckline and was really impossible to tell what it would look like once mended.

I haven’t replaced an elastic before but I figured it couldn’t be as difficult as grocery shopping so I bought it.

I was right!

Look how proud I am of myself and my beginner sewing skills.

Have you ever had someone else steal your cart full of groceries? Or been hit by another shopper with their cart?

I realize this is the second story about a shopping cart in a week. Seems to be a trend…

Linking up with Patti over at Visible Monday Visible Monday.

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